Oh, The Pain and Trauma

Why do we feel pain? So that we know we're alive. But, that is really contradicting the point of living. What's the point of living when we feel pain all the time, right?


Anyway, enough talk about living. Lets talk pain. Everyone feels pain. Great, cliche. Everyone feels different pains. Not bad, still a little cliche. Now, everyone FEELS traumatising pain at some point in their lives. Pain so unbearable we border on the point of life and death, emotionally and physically.


Hell, yeah. Tis' not something one would be particularly fond of talking about. But, the truth is, we need to face our fears, right? When there is something indescribable that is so painfully stuck in our minds, why the hell do even bother to bring it up? Because, we want to. Our nature of wanting to heard and felt by others mysteriously puts us in a state whereby we only want to talk about that deep pain inside, instead of finding ways to resolve it ourselves.


Okay, take 5, guys. Visualize everything we know about our pains or traumas which have been stuck inside us for light years. THIS IS NOT THERAPY. So, once we have grasped that, do whatever we think is best for ourselves. IF you want to let that pain 'destroy' you, let it. Or, if you were to 'destroy' it, then please, by all means, do.


Only we know what's best for ourselves. That's painful enough...

It's Coming Out...

Don't you ever feel like there may be something inside us that is just itching to burst out. Like a feeling so crazy you really want to just let it 'rip'. Unfortunately, we don't know what it is yet. How are we to make sure that these crazy intentions are friendly or foe-ey?



To be exact, it doesn't really matter. Why? Say if we had this burning desire to give flowers to someone. We think it's really unique that we are kind enough to do such a thing. Well, so are others. Whatever burning amibitons we may have, someone else has already 'been there, done that'. The point? Don't let go of what's inside us. Things that may seem petulant and ordinary are essential - when we need them most.



But, what if we don't need them? Do we really always need to have desires? Or is it human nature? My guess, a bit of both.

L-O-V-E

Oh  God, this is not going not be easy.

Look, I'm not stealing Rhonda Byrne's idea that "the Power of Life is Love". All I'm just saying is that love does help a lot. Why am I babbling about all this? Well, I feel it's not only love for people that we need to have, it's the love for everything we pursue. Our companions, jobs or cartoon shows. They say, as we get older. we realize the importance of happiness, well, in my opinion at least, we don't get enough love, that's why we somehow know that happiness is getting harder to reach.

A certain Moonwalker once said, "I just want to spread the love...". Now, he might have been a crazy guy to "want to spread love" but he wasn't. In the end (there really is no end for his records), he was right. Love is something not beyond reach, if only we try hard enough. And we do need it. Simple as that. Denial is just a part of it, right?

So, c'mon guys, spread the love! Man, this is preachy.

Meaningless Pessimism

Being pessimistic is good. Check. Being optimistic is even better. Check. Here's what we need to know about the rules of pessimism:


If we are pessimistic about something, it means we feel something, right? And of course, where there's negativity, there's always room for positivity. In the end, we do feel a little optimistic, right?


Alright, alright, that was really a useless thing to say. I mean, try being a little - lets just say- moody about life. And see whether we will feel more 'upbeat' about life. Why the hell would we care about feeling happier when we just cannot bring ourselves to the fact that there is no way out of our self-inflicted misery! Imagine we're in a hole, and we can't seem to get out, no matter what we do. And plus, the hole is getting narrower and narrower, and soon, we are plummeted into some kind of deep... I'm going to stop right there.


There we have it, folks. Unwanted, meaningless pessimism. But, do we really need it? For the sake of optimism to breed in our very minds?

The Art of Art

Wait, what?


What can we define of art? Well, as a complete 'unknown person' in art (I failed in art class), I can only ask anyone out there, who would be kind enough to spare his or her thoughts on the meaning of art. But, generally, isn't art about feeling something abstract? You know, looking at something familiar at a different vantage point.


So, looking at something differently can be shortened to one word; perspective. We must obtain perspective. Yeah, yeah, we all know how it is to see through perspective. Or do we? Often we are told to look at things in another way, and try as we do, we fail. Who's to blame? Nope, wrong question. What's to blame? Yep, that's what we should ask ourselves when we are faced with problems like how do I persuade my kid to play sports or how do I keep a healthy body. But, how do know what to take into perspective?


Compelling.That's how we need to view perspective. Be so compelling we wouldn't sleep.

Mixing Around

Right about the age of... well, about that age, we start thinking of making new friends. Wait, wait, rephrase! We begin to feel lonely and we need people to 'rely' on. But, how?


Obviously, it's not that hard to figure out why we need friends. But, really close friends? Friends who can we actually rely on. Blah, blah, blah. Those are the rare ones, and we can almost never find one. So, for those who just cannot find the right pal, hey, join the club!


It's not easy, because we always want to be loved. Probably, probably, we all need to 'mix' around.


Expanding our own circle of network would be the ideal thing to do, of course. Focus on the number of friends who have. Instead of looking for 'the one' (best friend or whatever), we should EXPAND! As crappy as it sounds (be patient), we have to start looking for some 'breath', guys. EXPAND!


Enough of that, plain simple, running out of words now really, so yes, EXPAND!

Great Expectations

No, it's not Charles Dickens we're talking about here.

Expectations are but things that we set for ourselves to improve ourselves. Repetitive as it may seem, we must have great expectations for ourselves. This is simple and direct.

But, with expectations comes tremendous pressure to deliver. An enormous weight burdens our backs and we're sometimes forced to do the things we hate. Which leads us to why we have been doing what we're doing. It's the expectation that we have put on ourselves that matters.

But, how to we cope with expectations? Should we take them seriously? Yeah, sure, we have to. But, if we don't take them too seriously, it wouldn't matter because we taking it easy, not too stress-fully. Besides, taking it easy does not mean taking it lightly. We are still entitled to give our best in everything.

Great expectations are often overlooked by everyone, simply because of its daunting task at hand. But, ask yourself, what ARE your expectations of anything? Then, when we go through the bad times, we would definitely get through unscathed.

What are bygones?

Yeah, yeah. We've all heard about that idiom.

But, what does it mean? Does it really mean that we should just let things 'go'? Forget about the past? I guess that's what it means, but it's not that easy, is it? To fully let go of something so tough, it's hard. It may be simple enough to let go of the things we WANT to forget, but what about the things we don't want to? Those precious moments, or the little things in life. What about them?

C'mon, there are surely times when we feel like we need to forget about things and times when we feel like we don't want to. Well, that's main point here, because what about the happy moments? We don't really forget some of our best (and happy) memories but, sometimes, like it or not, we do. And, that sucks. Bad.

Worst of all, we try to console ourselves by saying, "It's life, deal with it." Unfortunately, that just MAKES IT WORST. It's like living in a hole ( ARGH!!!!!). Heck, in the end, it doesn't really matter, I guess. We just have to brave through the worst, right? (Thanks a million, Rocky.)

P.S. I'm not whining. Just winning.

Going All OUT ~

"You're amazing, just the way you are~"

I've no idea why I started with that. Maybe it was just to catch your attention. Well, I think the title says it all. Look, writing this now feels a little off. Maybe it's because I've realized that we must somehow figure out a way to push our way through life. But, it's not any motivating crap you've heard before. I'm talking about getting through not only based on what we believe in, but what we need to believe all-around.

You see, I'm always under the impression that we are always basing (yes, BASING) ourselves based on one thing and one thing only. For example, if we love to have fun, we are kinda always 'basing' ourselves on a having-fun-kind-of-person, right? So, if we figure out a way not only to be a person who just loves to have fun, but to become.. you know, more than that, then we are able to be an all-rounder. Instead of going one-way, diversify, huh?

This might not appeal to all, but I reckon, if you give this a try, we'll be almost COMPLETE! *Laughs crazily* No.. sorry, just foolin' around guys. But really, look at this in a different perspective.

What happens next?

Oh, I tell you what'll happen next.. nothing!

That's right! Suck it up, folks, because nothing ever happens next. What's going to happen is that it fades. IF something something sure in life, is death and taxes, of course. But, surely, there's more to that saying?

Have you ever encountered something that would fade? Something that no matter what happens, in the end, it's gone. No really, you have! Do you think that's good? Is it damn bloody fantastic that everything has to just vanish, disappear or be gone in no time at all? Yes, it is, and it's bad. Like everything that ever existed, it has to fade.

But, this is not about trying to mourn over someone's death. Nor has this got anything to do with proving something. It's well, just.. just about that. Fade. That's the word. But, not everything will fade in a short time. Sometimes, we are given time to have fun, to bond or to get closer with the things we love.

But, no, as much as hope can provide, we are forced into nothing but an abyss, nothing less, nothing more. We are fading.

All Plain Stereostypes

Yes, we've all heard about stereotypes, haven't we?

They're irritating, malicious and fun. It's like saying, "Wives are the ones trying to find fault with the husband." or something like "Female drivers drive like crap. Or male drivers who drive like crap are sometimes branded 'a female driver'. Now, that's real stereotype.

Surely, there's something good to this? I mean, stereotype thinking should be limited to the fact that someone has a way or a certain mentality to something. That would be prejudice. Besides, what about things like hard work? Or "Practice Makes Perfect" ? Are those stereotypical?

Question is of course, how do we actually define a stereotype? No, it's very definition sounds so disapproving. Why can't we see it as something that is much more than "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" ? How come we don't just point out that phrases like "The most successful person is a risk-taker" are sliding into stereotype? I think, it's just the way it is, I guess. Human beings are built to think that the 'good' phrases are the ones which cannot be defined as a worn-out, crap mentality. We seem not to differ in opinions when it comes to b******t sayings, like " Africans are always gonna be left out in the world. And North Koreans aren't the most peaceful people. " Unfortunately, we stick to that way of thinking, and adopt that similar attitude. What a pity. Anything can be a stereotype, that's the way it is. It's just that we are seeing enough. Not understanding enough due to a faster-paced modern world.

But, we are all FLAWED. So who am I to judge? Man, such stereotype thinking.

Of whys and hows?

I've said before about why we do things. But over time, the whys don't become so important anymore. It's like asking why the universe is so big, and that would because, space is expanding. And then we ask why again. And why, why, why. It really doesn't matter does it? Then, how do we, lets put it this way, back up the why? How do we try to prove that we have reason to believe that the why really does matter? By finding the how.

I picked this all up from a quote from a businessman speaking on air. It was like, hey, not bad, he's actually talking sense (because normally, people like him are pretty hard to comprehend). That got me thinking up some 'possibilities'. According to him, most businesses are basically built on why we do things. Then we go to how we execute. Simple stuff, really. So, I thought, why can't we relate this theory to life as a whole?

Basics are what we need. But, why we carry out the basics is as important as.. well, it's important. Then, after we find the why for our basics, there are the hows. If you give a lil' bit of thought to this, this would be make sense. Simply said, it's better for you to find out about all this on your own.

Enough said, hopefully, you guys can tell me whether we need the whys and hows.

Admit, Endure

Ha! Got you there! Yeah! That's the way, man! Now these are the kind of the expressions when we feel.. well, good. But what about - OH man.. S**t.Why oh why..? Bloody hell!- Certainly, we feel.. well, bad.

What's the point, then? You know, we all have the right to whine and whinge when we feel tired of something. And sure you've heard about channeling all that 'bad' energy to something good. I ain't going to repeat that, of course. So what the hell are we supposed to do?

Logically, we should feel happier. In whatever way you can think of, you can just go on and take some anti-depression pills or something. The important part is that we endure. We must take it as it comes. It's like ups and downs in life. Sometimes, there is the high and the low. There is no denying that.

No, I am not taking anti-depression pills, because I seriously DO not think I'm.. well, you know. But, when there's something stuck in our system and we can't seem to take it out, we just have to hang in there. Show some grit in these hard times. Man, it's as if we have a serious bout of constipation.

Probably, it's all talk. Like what I've always said, there is no easy way out, is there?

Endure, for now, just like Liverpool. >adler_ng@hotmail.com<

Time for Shawshank

If you haven't watched one of the most famous heart-warming movies of all time, then well, what're you waiting for?


"Hope is a good thing." That was my highlight of the movie. What do you mean by hope? Is it just feeling good or is it just about saying it just for the sake of it? That's the thing nowadays, we are all fueled with hope. But hope, little did we know, must be understood to be felt. And that was another highlight of the movie, Andy spoke hope, because he knew the measure of it, that nothing could touch it. And let us be reminded of it over and over again.


To say why we need hope would be blatantly stupid. So, what is it that fuels hope? Do we mean things like music, sports, relationships? Technically, when we feel good while doing something, we are having hope. Hope that wants everything else would be calm and carefree for the rest of our lives.


Do we actually need to start feeling hope? Are we not already so messed up(by this, I mean busy, of course) that we are not entitled to search for this great feeling of hope? Well, it's up for us to decide, definitely. Simply nodding your head to your colleagues or wishing a happy, "Hey, man." can inject that sense of temporary happiness. And to all of us, that can certainly be considered as hope. HOPE.


I guess, as life goes on, we lose track of what we can actually achieve. But it doesn't hurt to hope.


"I hope" - Red (The Shawshank Redemption, 1994) Email me, adler_ng@hotmail.com

Caught Up.. Again?

I said before that we all need to get out of our comfort zone. That we must explore our minds, and put ourselves in a difficult situation for our own good. But what happens after we do that?

Do we just let go? Surely we take steps to continue doing something that keeps us away from our comfort zone. Which is only normal. But say, we start taking it for granted. Say, for instance, we suddenly just.. lose track of what we really want. And get caught up with everything else and, out of the blue, we 'stop' our 'staying-out-of-our-comfort-zone' thing. What happens?

Yes, I admit that I have not pushed myself to the fullest, out of my own comfort zone. And yes, I have come out with my own lame excuses. And YES, I do know that there must be others like me. And self-obsessed as I am. But, what really matters is of course redeeming ourselves. Simply by correcting our mistakes. Get back to getting out of our comfort zone. If we hate public speaking, and we do something about it, that's good. But if we don't continue our efforts to like public speaking, then we'll just be the same ol' person who was just too much of a chicken to speak in front of everyone.

Whatever happens, it always does come down to what we do that matters. We might talk and think about it. Or we might just pretend to be out of our comfort zone. It'll all be useless if we don't put our best efforts in it.

Get the drift? Get out of your shell again! Share your thoughts at adler_ng@hotmail.com.

What's New?

No, course not, I'm not talking about the iPhone 4! Quite the contrary.

It's without a doubt that nowadays, it's getting more important to be finding a new direction to things. I mean to say, look at people like Steve Jobs or Christopher Nolan (sorry,but I really do admire these guys). They are the ones who are thinking up new ideas for the future. They are constantly obsessed with their philosophies of how things should be run, one way or another.

Still, we need to ask ourselves, what's the big deal? Why the heck should we care about "exploring something new"? Because, one day, we are all going to realize that, we need to. We simply need to change (if you would call that). If there's a time for us to be the next revolutionist, it surely is now.

But how do we define something as new? Well, something new doesn't have to be totally new! Sometimes, all we need to do is find an idea that has already been there, and use that idea! For example, everybody knows, we can be rich by making money. So, we find 101 ways to do that. But, little did we know that making money is more than that. It's about keeping it and finding ways to 'expand' it. That idea has already been there, but it's just too bad we didn't realize earlier. (Of course, this idea has already been used)

But, what does it actually take to be "new"? As always, that's for you to find out.

New is the old! Email the writer at adler_ng@hotmail.com.

That "In" Feeling

I've said many times now that we have find the basics of everything. People can achieve anything simply because they know the roots of something. But, how do we actually find the basics? And mark my words, basics is everything. I read a quote today and said, "Don't just build castles in the air,  build the foundations underneath them."

So, the big question really is, how? How do know that we have found the basics for something we want to do? It is not enough to merely judge, and say, " Yep, I think i found my way already". This would of course lead to us being complacent and in the end lose focus.

What then? Alright, lets add a little emotion to it. Lets say, " Sports is all about determination." That's your basics, but like I said, it ain't enough just saying it. So, now, we feel it. It is simple. Just say it and feel it to mean it. (that's a little corny)

You see, when we feel what we've said, which is adding belief into our words, we get the chance perform it. By saying, thinking and feeling like determination is very important in sports, it's easier to be determined. The same thing applies to most basics.

Well, what're you waiting for? Go find your basics (and remember to feel it).

The writer feels that people like Steve Jobs or Roger Federer are still going strong due to their impeccably strong, upheld beginnings.

Email me at adler_ng@hotmail.com.

Why then?

                I just watched one of Anthony Robbins' 'motivational videos'. He didn't call himself as motivational. Why so? Funny, I thought. But then, he said, "I'm a 'why' person!"

                Exactly what he meant, I wasn't sure at first. Obviously, when i thought about it for a while, I just knew he was right. Simply because, we need to know why, more than how, what, when, or which. That was his point. People expect him to motivate, but instead get something better, they are given a purpose.

                Okay, this all sounds too advertisement-like. Okay, back to why. We should all realize that we always think of why. Why I did this or that or whatever! It is without a doubt a question of why.

               He also mentioned something that had to do with emotions. Surely you've heard this one before. But for those of you who hadn't, well, for your information,  emotions affect our decisions, which affect our lives. That sounds far-fetched, but rest assured, you will realize this soon enough.

              Why then do I bring this up? Why oh why? That's for you to find out. But do give a try, find a way to ask, "WHY?" Mark my words, there's always a point, a goal, or an aim for us to pose that question. As we do that, we feel those little emotions, that we thought would never affect us.

              It's not in our nature where we feel that emotions are rendered useless. We need them, and they need us. (Yes, this sounds stupid.) But give it a try. Ask why, and think of your emotions, for they would decide why.

The writer feels this may be rubbish talk, but try. Email me at adler_ng@hotmail.com, or just leave a something in the shoutbox.

Know-it-all

Yeah, we're all like that sometimes. Or are we?

The answer's simply yes, we are arrogant. We do get disrespectful towards others. But why?It's probably because we take this things too seriously. It's as if we think about something so hard and long, and someone tells us that we're stupid, then we feel a little like wanting to punch that guy. That guy must be like, the most idiotic person in the world.

That's also probably why the world is crumbling. But.. I'm not going into that. This might be a little too subjective. Lets go a little deeper. To be arrogant is to be stubborn over something stupid. As if we're always right! As if everyone else doesn't "understand" you!

Well,  unfortunately, often, everybody knows we're being like that, except us. It's beyond our puny brain that we feel conceited. We just don't KNOW. But we think we do.

Well, I don't actually know how and why we become arrogant. But put it this way, we are equal; so, it's only fair to say that, we are ALL arrogant.

Arrogance is good, says the writer. What say you? Come talk; adler_ng@hotmail.com

Judging Well

How do we measure a person's attitude? How do know whether he's a good person? Or whether he's a 'bad' person? Well, it seems now that more than ever, it's not how, but why. Why do we judge?


It's easy to get carried away. It's all too simple for us to start thinking, "Hey, that guy seems so arrogant. Or that lady feels so bitchy." What causes us to be like that? What actually sparks our intention to judge people? Well, some could say that it's human nature. And they're right, it is. But that's only when our sub-conscious takes place. So, when we're fully aware of what we're doing, how then do we control that judgment?


Well, it's high time we control the part that says, "Hey, you're a real ass." Which leads to how? Well, to judge is to believe, to see, to understand. So, it's simple. When we need to understand, there must  be a meaning to it. Therefore, to judge is to seek meaning. Not to tease, laugh at people or simply for the sake of it.


Ah, you must wondering now about your past experiences of judging someone. Was it out of spite or hatred? Or was it because so that you could understand more? Well, you decide. It's all to easy to get carried away and start judging for 'fun'. But I'm sure, like me, you could do better than that.


The writer feels undeterred by the jeers and boos of his fans. Please, say something! Email me at adler_ng@hotmail.com or leave a quickie in the shout box below.

Period.

What are we to say that we don't need time to improve? I'll keep it short this time.

It's not easy doing something new. And boy, did I realize that. But sooner or later, I knew that it needed more time. I knew some things needed more time. TIME.

And patience too. You see, everything takes some sinking in. It's like trying to play a new sport. It all takes a little time. Man, I can't keep repeating this. So, what's the point? Well, I would like to say that there is no point, but that's not what this is all about, is it?

All I'm saying is when we are trying to so something, new or not, we need time. If you could just imagine what would happen when we are given more time to do something, we can improve ourselves. Get better. Stronger. And obviously, not giving up. Ah-ha! So that's what I was looking for.

Yes, ladies and gents, it's about not giving up too. What can we say about that? Hmm, I reckon, if given enough time, we can actually develop that feeling of doggedness. Got that? By doggedness, I mean, determination.

I'm probably pushing it by now. So, take some time to stick in there, guys. Period.

The writer feels absurd by the very nature of time and determination. If you do not know what to say, just leave a quickie in the shoutbox below. Or email me at adler_ng@hotmail.com.

The POWER of Learning

Robert Kiyosaki. He said, this is the Information Age. (Yeah, many other people probably said that too) But what did he mean? What did he mean by Information Age? A couple of decades ago, it was the Industrial Age, then.. well, I'm not too sure. All I know is, we are in the Information Age, ladies and gentlemen!

Hmm, you might be wondering, what on earth is that? To me, yes, to me, and to you, to everyone else, information is about learning. To learn is to gain information. Yep, people, wake up and smell the goddamn roses. Without the power of learning, we ain't getting information.

Look, it's probably too general to say "information". It can mean anything, guys. Anything at all. We learn all the time. Sub-consciously, we learn and learn. Without realizing it, we are learners. Now, in every Age, there is a way to move forward. There is always a way to get ahead of people. And in this Age, the Information Age, one way to get ahead is to learn. It's simple.

Now, it's probably foolish of me to tell the ways of learn. Because I don't have to. It's human nature. We learn or we'll die. So, nurture that learning power. Then, you'll know you're getting a head start in life.

The writer feels sorry for those who think they've learned enough. If you have something else to say about this, email me at adler_ng@hotmail.com or simple say something in the shoutbox below.

It's all about messing up the mind

What's wrong with me? Well, nothing!

What have you got against your very mind? Are you always "at one" with your mind? Are you always co-operating with your mind? Hmm, guys, it's time we take a step back to take a step forward. What are we talking here? Are you messed up?

I'm currently in a state of a messy mind. It's really bad. It's just not working out, man. It's like you try to tell yourself you can do something or it's gonna be alright. But, somehow, we just can't. If we keep controlling the mind, we're messing it up. Yes, you heard this one before, and you probably went through this.

So, what? What the hell is going on then? What am I trying to imply? I don't know.. maybe I'm just going through  an emotional week. Sometimes, things do get out of hand. And we cannot do ANYTHING about it. There is no such thing as balance when you feel out of place. It's like playing football. We go out to the park ready to kick some balls, when suddenly, it rains. And when it rains, it's pouring. So we have no control of the rain. But we're still so upbeat that the rain will go away but, it's not. We pray and pray, but nothing works.

                 It keeps raining..

Well, enough said. Control or no control. It's a messy mind. But when the rain stops, there's sunshine. Wow. Surely, this will all turn out good.

*The writer feels that there should be more rain. If you have anything to say, email me to adler_ng@hotmail.com. OR you could just write in the shoutbox.*

Building the Right Side

You know, you pretty much heard about developing the left side of the brain. But what about the right side? What are we to do with that?

I'm not quite sure about this but I think the left side of the brain is pretty much about academical studies. Basically, we solve algebras using the left side. But I wonder, what about the right side? Is it about the inner part of us which shows artistic talent? Yeah, I reckon so.

But why am I stressing this out? Hmm, I guess I'm been fiddling around with my left side too long. So I've come to realize that the right side of the brain needs to be polished (Yes I know, this sounds ridiculous and obvious) But, how? As always, I was very interested. Please, by all means, tell me.

Is it a matter of being an artistic person? Am I supposed to learn some arts? Maybe, probably, but it sure is relaxing. (I even came up with a crazy conclusion that most of the stress comes from the left side) But I'm not so sure it's that way.

If you have any mind-boggling questions, please email me at adler_ng@hotmail.com or just leave a quickie in the shoutbox.

Obsessing about obsession

It's a sad thing in life where you have to obsess about something. But we never do get over it, do we? I'm sure, we've all been addicted to something. It probably feels good to do so. But with obsession, comes desperation.

I've been a little obsessing about certain things. But not of the little things like chocolate or watching a tv show. It's kind of a relationship obsession. I've been seeing relationships between people in a different way. More or else trying to learn a thing or two about why and who. Yes, I know, you have no idea.

But that's a good thing. Because, you see, when you're going through almost the same routine, seeing the same people, you tend to realize about things which matter between you and your pals. You want to build trust. Just like what I'm doing with you right now. I'm trying to build trust with you.

But, what is obsession? It's something insane. It's something when you know you can't get over it in a short period of time. It's about losing control. Letting loose. But is it good? Or bad? Or maybe.. good and bad?

There are times when we feel the need to know the meaning of it all. Why? How? Just like Einstein, some way or another, we'll certainly feel a little "edgy" and excite ourselves over petty things. Like what, you may ask? Well, ask yourself! Everyone has obsessions. What's yours?

It's definite that we'll never get over it. NEVER. We may get over it after some time. But we never do get over it. So, what now? What's the point then? Take a breather. Listen to your heart, and let it guide you.


What's your take on all this? E-mail me at adler_ng@hotmail.com. Or you could just say it out aloud in the shoutbox.

Thinkering Intellectually

Nope, you probably just swore at people. And that's a good thing. That proves you have heart. You are being emotional, that's great. But wait, what if you decided to look at that situation in a different way?

I mean, why not, say, think it over? Your boss probably said no to your raise, but there must be a suitable reason for it, right? (yeah, right) Yes, I know, it's a long shot you're gonna rationalize with your stubborn colleagues. But, stop. Please, refrain yourself from being overwhelmed by those nasty traits of anger, violence and hatred. There MUST be a reason this is ALL happening.

It's usually tough. But with some tinkering like Ranieri using your brain and not your guts would do you good. (Well, he did bounce back and bring success in Italy)

Obviously, there are times when you gotta rely on your emotions. But just remember, your brain only functions less than 10 % everyday. That's Man's biggest failure. Stupidity might result in money and jobs being lost. You could go into a mid-life crisis if you rely most on your emotions. Sure, bravery really is important in athletes, but chances are, you're just a 9-to-5 worker. So, rationalize, use your intellect.

Equally.

What does that word mean to you? Does it mean to treat people equally? Probably. I'm sure you have someone whom you don't really understand. He's probably getting on your nerves. You don't know what to do about it. I do. I do have people whom I can't really stand.

I've got this friend whose always bugging me. He's not really the sensible type. He's just not really satisfied with me or something. But, I'm not gonna tell, F*** O**. He's my friend. But I soon found out he's just upset over what I did to him some time ago. You see, it's easier to understand people when we relate them to ourselves. I mean, if someone punches you, will you do the same to him? Maybe, you stole his girlfriend or killed his brother.

So, before we start judging people and telling them they're stupid, you gotta understand that sometimes, we can all be like him or her. We can be as foolish as them or as intelligent as them. We are all equal.

P.S. : Watch the video below.

Being objective ( I mean.. )

To be objective is to be precise. Huh? I mean, we have to be a little more clear. Whether we realize this or not, we gotta be clear. I found out that we motivate people better if we are more objective. How does that work, you might ask? It's simple.

Imagine you're in a football field, you're coach tells you, c'mon! You must play better! And you look at him as if asking, what? How in the world are we gonna play better? But.. like most coaches, he gives you a stare. In the end, you're clueless about what you seem to be doing. That's being subjective.

Normally, we are really subjective people. Of course, as how the world works, 90% of people have no sense of wanting to improve themselves. Sometimes, they're just too self-assured. They don't care whether in life, they need to learn about new things. So you gotta make sure you don't fall into that path. Learn and keep learning. What has this got to do with anything? It's being objective, that counts.

Being objective can also mean I'm saying no to something. It's like in the movies, when a couple is about to wed, suddenly, I appear out of nowhere and say no man, I love you, don't get married with this guy. I'm probably saying this is good for you, but nah, being subjective would do you much good, too.

So off you go, experiment a little. Or am I being subjective?

Comfy?

I've been in a comfort zone! Darn, we all have been in a comfort zone every now and then. What? A comfort zone? Never heard of it! You see, a comfort zone is a period where we feel comfortable. Metaphorically, it means we're not doing anything. Well, anything good or productive at least.

Now, I'm in my comfort zone because I've not been doing much! I've been lazy, arrogant and a little crazy. But nothing productive. If you don't know, I'm that kind of annoying guy who wants to do something and be inspiring. So what do I do when I'm in my comfort zone? Nothing. Why? Because when we are in our comfort zones, we don't know that. We just continue being fools of our own! Until...

Someone shakes us! Yeah, the old-fashioned wake-up call. I got mine, and it was a little sad. You start to realize why I've not been doing this and that. We realize how pathetic how life is! Doing the same thing everyday, without actually achieving anything. Many of us don't really care about all this. And good, that means you're in your comfort zone. So, who's gonna shake you?

The truth is, the ones who can truly tell us that we're in our comfort zone is the ones who we trust. If you know you can shake yourself, then sorry mate, you got that one wrong. It's not so easy telling ourselves to wake up from our slumber. It's not easy for us to tell ourselves to do something. That's why you gotta find that one person who can tell you whether you need to change or not.

Living with Emotions

I feel like bursting out in tears.. huh? No wait, I feel angry! Nah, I feel HAPPY. Oh no, I feel sad, angry and happy. How's that possible? I'm a little short of emotions, as I just realized. I've been a bit of a "stone" kind of person. I don't know if I can take it all in...

In the past, I didn't really realize the importance of feeling emotional. Y'know,  everyone seems to forget the one thing that defines us all. Our emotions! We probably don't know this, but more and more people are not 'feeling it'. To be honest, are you really an emotional person?

Now, you must be getting confused.. do I mean emotional in a good way or in a dramatic way? Well, that's up to you. I mean, I'm just saying, sometimes, we gotta be emotional. We should be brave at heart, and not think too much, and just do it! (thanks, Nike!) Feel it to do it. Some things only require a little emotions to work.

So, please, feel a little anger or anything that has got to do with your emotions. Then, you know everything's turning out just fine and dandy. I pretty much had an emotional week. Maybe, that's why I telling you about all this. I just feel that sometimes, we all need to have a little emotions in ourselves. Experiment with yourself a bit, and you might just feel a little better. Feel that anger, joy, sarcasm, guilt, disappointment, vanity, whatever!(but don't bite off more than you can chew) I did all that, but it's not enough.. maybe, I'm just emotion-less. Noooo~

Change- Is it really necessary?

"If I can change, you can change! Everybody can change!" "Tonight, the world's gonna change!" "In this fast-paced world, we must change and keep changing," We've heard these quotes a billion times. But what have we learned?  That we must change?

I'm sure we've all changed during some point of our lives. But, are we really changed? I've recently come up with  a conclusion, which is we change ourselves, only change back into our normal self. I'm sure I'm pretty right! I tried to be an angel, a new and improved person. But that doesn't work. In the end, as time wears out, it all becomes weird.. and before you know it, you're just the very same person you were. A depressed, rude guy.

So what's change for then? Is it just because your friend or your mother told you to change, you changed? Please, do not get me wrong, I'm all for change. If we do not change, we can never explore the part of ourselves which make us more special. We get to know ourselves better when we change. That's true.

So you know, change's not really a bad thing! I just feel change is over hyped, sometimes. Everyone thinks it's good, but it's not really as amazing as we think. But, we must change. That, I agree.

The Point?

"The point is...." C'mon, you've said a thousand times already! I certainly have. Sometimes, we need to get back to the point, right? So, what's the point? You know, lets just go straight to the point. I would like you to think about the point at this moment of your life. Well, what is it?

In my case, I got a bit of a wake-up call. I feel like I need to be good in most of the things I do. I gotta always push, push, push. Because, to me, I feel there's almost nothing impossible to achieve if you put your mind to it. I can do this, I can do that. I'm that type of guy (nerd) who's that annoying over-achieving dude. I must be better than who I am!

It's not that I changed or anything.. I just found out how self-assured I am. I feel very confident in everything, but that confidence cannot be expressed well. It can't be felt by the people around me. So I feel good, but only on the inside. The best things in life are the ones enjoyed by ourselves and other people. And that happens to many of us. We feel so self-assured we keep it to ourselves.

We must share that joy and feeling of accomplishment. That way, you can feel better! Sure, this sounds farcical. This may sound like a clueless guy talking. Ah, who cares? Please, for once, we should not be so self-assured. Everyone knows you can do that or do this. But the point is, we gotta give it to others. Let them feel what you're feeling.

Well, the point is.. I learned a little from that self-assured attitude of mine. And you must do so, too. Admit it, everything's a learning process.

                Congratulations Lee DeWyze! You're the American Idol!

        (Yes, I may be biased. I'm a fan! And boy, he looks self-assured!)

Believe in the Worst?

Gosh, things come and go really fast. So fast,  you can't even stop to think. But.. I guess, that's life. Everything's so quick, you can savor those little things. Well, I'm starting to feel that way. I wanna enjoy " those little things". Those things that make me laugh (or cry). 

Oh no.. I forgot, we can't do that. Because we're not living in a fairytale. We can't go around thinking about "the little things"! This is where it gets tight. Sometimes, we are at the crossroads. We gotta choose. Do want to be or not to be? Hmm, I say, screw this, sometimes, it doesn't really matter.

It's a new perspective. Guys, sit back and think. Have we ever been in a tight situation? Where the odds are against us? Where we think we're gonna lose? Most of us would back off. Well, think about it. What if? We decide to go against the tide? And say, no sirree-bob, God almighty, I ain't gonna back down!

And then, you think, "Hey, relax man, what's the worst that can happen?" Yes, what's the worst? Many (just too many) of us are fearful of what might happen if we do this, or do that. The bad consequences. We don't choose to do something (although it is right) just because we're scared of the "worst case scenario". That's why we gotta do it! We gotta take risks!

What's the worst that can happen, man? You losing your job? No man, that's not gonna happen. You losing money? No man, that's ridiculous. You know why? Because that's all not gonna happen! The worst will not happen! Think about it, when you think something bad's gonna happen, it's not. That's the (wonderful) truth.

But.. obviously, there has to be a boundary. You can't always think like this. Obsession is never good. You have to know when it's right. You can't just go jumping off a cliff, thinking the worst ain't gonna happen. It's just that, sometimes, you have to risk it!

                                                Become the dinosaur in yourself and risk it!

Backfiring Confidence?

There has to come a point when we feel.. awesome! Yeah, we feel on top of world. No one can touch us. But you know, there's always a but. You kinda feel a little unreal.. or a little empty inside. Nah, what's that? " Of course not, I'm just too good for everything. I'm on top of the world remember?" Now, that's where we lose it.

Sure, don't worry. I'm probably wrong.. and you can go continue being at the top. This may sound like a so-called "wake-up call" for you. But no.. instead, it's far from that. Imagine you're successful in your relationship, your work and your.. your everything! But, you know you should always be humble. You should always learn to give back.

Oh, how you wish you could continue being who you are. Being at the top. But,quite the contrary, you feel fear. Sad thing living in fear. You either love or hate it. Well, of course, I had the chance to feel that fear. That's why you gotta live it. Living in fear comes from that burning desire to be always confident.

It does fade. We feel that fear every now and then. Good thing is fear fades away..... and when it's gone, we feel great again. It's a whole cycle again! We feel great, then we feel fearful. Believe or not, it's true. Our whole life is a vicious cycle. This is what we do to ourselves everyday. We go through this thing called " The Cycle" .

You may call me a loser or a Lame-O. You may call me a nutter. I am. I really am.

You Can't Please Everyone..

I'm sure you've heard that one before.. now please, hear it one more time. You cannot please everybody! Everytime you do something, everytime you say something, there's definitely somebody who hates you. Believe it or not, that's good. Yeah, goooooood. Why?

Now you may wonder, why everyone loves bringing this up. Simply, maybe it's because we all know, at some point, we mustn't lose track of who we are just because someone tells  us we're no good. Sure, I've got people telling me, " Go F*** O** " or " Eh, idiot boy, you suck MAN" . But, you probably think I'm gonna say, " No, man, you have to prove them wrong," or something like that.. well, no, this time, I feel you should know how to follow your instincts a bit. It's like what I'm telling you now, do this or do that.. but most importantly, you gotta know WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU!

You don't wanna dress up like Lady Gaga, but you know it's cool. It's hippy, it's current and it's way more expensive than what your friends are wearing. Now comes the sad truth. You don't want to wear it. Because it feels so "la-la" and so tight, so weird, and so not you. Boy oh boy, didn't take you so long to realize that, huh?

         Some called him a freak when he became president. But you cannot please everyone.

Do what's right. And you'll be the best of the lot. Like that Afro dude up there!